Worst Sentence Challenge & New Collaboration Project. (Closed)

Stories/Excerpts, , , , , , , , , 86 Comments

Hello everyone.

Remember that poll?


šŸ¦—

…With the collaboration and challenge topics?

šŸ¦—

Well then. This is awkward.

To recall, we had a poll to vote on for the next collaboration or challenge project. The topic that polled the highest was the worst sentence challenge. What else was interesting were the topics that tied in second place: the novel collaboration and the non-fiction contest.

Hereā€™s the deal, I will run one other project alongside the worst sentence challenge so that it can disseminate not only to more people, but so that it can include different options available for writers. More on that near the end of this post.**

The worst sentence challenge will last for three weeks starting July 24thā€”August 15th ending at midnight (August 16th) EST time. Keep in mind, I will not accept any entries under this prompt if submitted after the challenge officially ends.

I want this to be good (bad, I want this to be bad). I want you to maim and torture the Oxford Comma until thereā€™s nothing left but an Ox. Thatā€™s how terrible.

I want you to write the most ridiculous sentences that you wouldnā€™t even want to share with Grandma.

…Though if Grandma happens to hear it, thatā€™s Grandmaā€™s fault.

This is not a contest, just a writing challenge. I will post all the responses in the order received after the challenge ends. You can leave a pingback or a comment below with your worst sentence to participate in the challenge. Multiple entries are allowed and encouraged.

A primary example of what a worst sentence can be: ā€œSilly Sally with a smile and long-stock pippy stockings walked away from the Barbie grill and said, ā€˜Itā€™s time to cook mom!ā€™ā€

It doesnā€™t have to make sense (like the above), it can use incorrect terms or phrasing, and it can have a crude, dark sense of humor.

Just one sentence pleaseā€”it can be a long or short one. Nothing more, nothing less. As well, I know we all just want to axe grammar and spelling rules–but if you do so, just make sure it can still make sense to the reader. We all want to appreciate your madness properly.

The rules still apply, though. However, in essence:

I will not accept anything religious, outwardly political, hateful, pornographic, slurs, or anything that is demeaning, threatening or harmful in its content. Please nothing that is against a particular group, or anything that demeans a certain group of people that would be considered racist, homophobic, sexist, religious discrimination or prejudice. I will not accept your piece if that is such the case.

**As mentioned, the worst one sentence challenge is not the only topic I’m hosting. I am as well hosting a novel collaboration. It has very similar rules to the prior story collaboration, but it will be lengthy and as well, it will not have a specific deadline in mind. It will be ongoing until I feel we’re at or near the end of our novel collaboration. Please refer to this post for more information.

86 thoughts on “Worst Sentence Challenge & New Collaboration Project. (Closed)”

  3. I written good my entirely: life, “so” dont tell me perhaps , I knew more than I, not you or any one! <— this one on the other hand is credited to someone I once had an argument with online

    Liked by 8 people

    Reply

    1. Christ, the irony in this one alone… If they were trying to prove a point, I think they missed the meaning of their own point.

      That is indeed a pretty bad sentence. My eyes are just straining from this.

      Liked by 3 people

      Reply

      2. I agree with you.

        Now, I have a question: Would you take offense if I include that sentence when I release all the entries in a few weeks? I’m asking since I’m not sure if you wanted me to or not.

        The sentence alone is just so terrible, especially with the given context of it being real, it just hurts to read. It is the true definition of what would be considered a worst sentence.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Here’s my entry.
    Because of the broken glass all over the ground, but not only the glass, also the horrible smell of the meth lab and the scary dog that could pull his stake out of the ground the way he charges at you, but not only the glass, the smell, the dog, it’s also the riots in the streets every night with terrorists throwing Molotov cocktails into stores an looting them, but not only the glass, the smell, the dog, the riots with terrorists but also the cops arresting people and tear gassing the peaceful people along with the terrorists, but not only the glass, the smell, the dog, the terrorists, the cops, the teargas, also, the weather is stopping me from going out in the heat and humidity, and all those things things are really making the situation go straight to hell downtown, so I had to start ordering my Molly straight from India online and it should arrive tomorrow, then everything will be ok for a few hours.

    Liked by 8 people

    Reply

    1. Typos are allowed, if not encouraged. šŸ˜‰

      This is such a run-on sentence, I love it. Probably the longest sentence I’ve ever read in one sitting, hahaha. Excellent work here with great social commentary. The world is indeed so sick and sad.

      Like

      Reply

      2. I read it. Your description is appropriate: so bad, it’s good!

        Great sentence, my mind is still doing aerobics over what I just read. Fantastic!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. My entry:
    ā€œShe walked quickly up the stairs her amber hued orbs carefully outlined with liquid eyeliner and a bit of mascara looking around as she flicked back her long golden hair as she straightened her blue minidress with the white lacing around the edges, she waved at one of her friends as she went upstairs Iā€™m going upstairsā€ she said.

    Liked by 9 people

    Reply

    1. Oh, I just love this. Three times, itā€™s referenced sheā€™s going up the stairs, and how she just casually says it at the end… šŸ˜‚ It kills me.

      Love it. šŸ‘

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

  9. I’ll give this a try:

    “he looked through a mirror leaning on his bedroom wall, he was positive he isn’t going to make the cut at the interview and the weather had rained so gloriously he was, so sure he needs an umbrella except the umbrella was wet and not dry.”

    Liked by 6 people

    Reply

  10. All that comes to my mind are the Jack Sparrowā€™s gibberish dialogues from pirates. They are wonderful but not written by me.

    Sample-
    ā€˜No. If we don’t have the key, we can’t open whatever we don’t have that it unlocks. So what purpose would be served in finding whatever need be unlocked, which we don’t have, without first having found the key what unlocks it?ā€™

    Liked by 7 people

    Reply

  11. This is actually quite difficult. My entry:
    He wasn’t sure which way to go, so he asked the man who didn’t know neither and it was January the 5th of November and tge streets were crowded in the summer heat, he could feel the sweat under his brow and decided to take the path on the way back home where he didn’t have anywhere to live anyway.

    Liked by 6 people

    Reply

  12. Here is my entry, maybe I will make a post too, but for now, I’ll give it to you here:

    When we were warriors, we would want whatever we wish we wanted, we would weild whatever weapon we wanted, we would wear whatever we wished we wore, we would walk wherever we wished we walked, when we were warriors, we wouldn’t want what we will.

    šŸ˜¬šŸ˜¬L

    Liked by 8 people

    Reply

    1. Could you elaborate on that? šŸ™‚ Iā€™m not quite sure what you mean in this context.

      Since this is a worst sentence challenge, it can definitely have a moral take on it, just as long as itā€™s a sentence that doesnā€™t follow the conventional rules; you can have a run-on sentence, switch around the subject and predicate, have a few typos, and whatever else that would create a horrible sentence.

      Like

      Reply

  15. Heres my submission:
    Now, since my thoughts are flying in a rather confusing array of directions, at least at the present moment, I thought I would preface this post with the aforementioned disclaimer before I end up lost somewhere in the wilds of Uzbekistan with you sitting there with that particularly enchanting, though perhaps somewhat frustrating (at least for you) puzzled expression on your face that most people end up having when they sit down and read one of my whirling posts, most particularly on nightā€™s such as this when the words are flowing faster than I can logically keep up with, though often, depending upon the moonā€™s cycle or how much chocolate and/or caffeine I may have had before sitting down to begin writing, it can be a rather bewildering experience; whereat, being the kindhearted soul that I am, and never wishing to intentionally lead someone into a grammatical quagmire, as I am for all intents and purposes a good soul ( though you and I both know that even good souls have haloā€™s that glow neon red now and again) I generally tend to use this moment of perplexity to point out that I did warn you, my dearest readers, very early on in our relationship (that being the early days of BnV) that I do have the most annoying (or potentially amusing, dependant once again upon the aforementioned phase of the moon or how much chocolate or caffeine Youā€™ve ingested before beginning to read) predilection to run off on wild tangents of verbosity that would make even Charles Dickensā€™s head ache, but let that go.

    Word Count: 258
    Sentences: 1
    Passive Sentences: 0
    Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level 52.2 ā€¦. YES!!!!!!!!!!! (My work here is done, thank you)

    Liked by 6 people

    Reply

    1. Lordy, I think I have a headache now. šŸ˜€ Excellent worst sentence (hey, an oxymoron!) It never ends, doesn’t precisely have a clear point, and I felt like I was transported into a novel using Charlotte BrontĆ«’s tone with Dalton Trumbo’s prose. Fantastic horrible sentence!

      Like

      Reply

  16. Your going to have to pick up youā€™re study book if their going to make it to theyā€™re class on time, to take that test weā€™re the teacher talks about how were going to get all those corn stalks out of the hay field: that where going to cook up for this dinner next week when the too boys promised to take the pie two grandmas house and not maybe eat a piece on the way to but first you better study four that test before you go too class tomorrow; even still those boys might just chow down on that there desert before we are able to cook the corn at a descent our before hour dad comes home today.

    Thereā€™s my contribution. Hope you enjoy…or maybe not so much. šŸ˜‚

    Liked by 4 people

    Reply

    1. Ah, hahaha! This is perfect. I love it so much. I enjoyed reading it greatly, especially with cringing at all the errors and spelling mistakes. This is exactly what I was looking for in this challenge. You nailed it here! šŸ˜

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. šŸ˜‚ Being a bit of a grammarian geek, the ā€œyour/youā€™re,ā€ ā€œto/too/two,ā€ and ā€œthere/their/theyā€™reā€ mishaps always get to me! I am so obsessive with these, my sons have become quite attentive in their writings as well. šŸ˜… Oh!! I should have added ā€œitā€™sā€ and ā€œitsā€ in there! Oh well. Weā€™ll have to rectify that next time! šŸ˜‰ Enjoy reading!

        Liked by 1 person

  17. Hey, I know I have posted my piece but I feel like posting another one. I know the rules don’t allow it but you don’t have to include both of them in your roundup post and just choose whichever one you like more. Please can I post another one?? That one feels more bad to me. Sorry for the inconvenience

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. No, itā€™s not an inconvenience at all! Iā€™m happy you asked. Thereā€™s no limit in this challenge. You can include as many horrible sentences as you like. šŸ˜ƒ The more, the merrier.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. Oh thanks a lot. Then here you go:

        When my mom came to wake me up this morning for school, I was already trying to wake myself up but a few seconds ago I had realised that my mom would come and wake me up, so eventually I had gotten tired of trying to wake myself up so I had stopped trying to wake myself up, so when my mum tried to wake me up, I was back into a big sleep and she was uanble to wake me up so my mom got tired of trying to wake me up so she went away which meant that I was left to try to wake myself up again, but my sleepy brain wouldn’t allow me to try to try to wake myself up so instead of trying to try to wake myself up I decided it was best to just lie there, sleep and try to not to try to try to wake myself up because it would lead me to nowhere and the worst that could happen would that I would miss the school and be rewarded an egg in my maths test and since I am a pure vegetarian, it would be of no use, and this made me think how it would feel like to be rewarded a Pi in maths test as at least I would able to eat it and this delicious thought made me wake myself up.

        šŸ˜†

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Oh English Conventions God, please have mercy for us all. šŸ˜ƒ My favorite part was the switch from ā€œmomā€ to ā€œmumā€. Thereā€™s so much to love here with this overall.

        The repetition works well too. An excellent worst sentence. šŸ–Š

        Like

  18. Hey, thanks a lot, it means so much to me, you have no ideašŸ˜„šŸ˜„. I am so glad you liked itšŸ¤—šŸ¤—šŸ¤—šŸ¤—. Do keep posting these various challenges, they are tons of fun.
    Thank you so much once againšŸ˜…

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  21. Apologies in advance, Lucy. Here’s what jumped into my head. Nothing on the gems above, but you might as well have it. (Is that two bad sentences?)

    Space boats screaming to a halt round polyglots of fashionable festering rubbish the entire lot of miserable scabs scathed saucily at several sweet symbiots.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  22. Hi Lucy….please accept my entry. I know this will sound crazy but i guess the more crazy mire better it is.

    “The bossy carpe crab didn’t cut the crap coming out of the cultivated cabbage entangled in the reins of the black horse with donkey ears intermingled with the scales of a poignant preacher preserved in the pickled prunes down the oak well stuffed sniffed cucumbers rotten along the dry carrots cut through the shelled scallops shredded to right amalgamation for making a ripened rotten pumpkin hat adorn the bald head of the caucasian puppy bewildering the thorny roses amidst the moonlit dark night…”

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    1. Oh, this is hilarious! Youā€™re right indeed, the crazier, the better. I love it. It doesnā€™t make sense and itā€™s just amazing with the imagery. Excellent work!

      Like

      Reply

  24. Not that the end was drawing near, or the day was just beginning, but the fact that too many months had passed and finally, without hesitation, the young school girl with a backpack heavy with learning, left the safe haven of her home and neighborhood, cognizant of those who had gone before her into the quagmire of education that promised a degree of brilliance that she so desired during this time of ineptitude.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  26. oh still time for one more. Okay here goes:

    When I went down to the uptown down upised down bar that i saw that one lady talkiing ever so muchly with her big fat mouth dripping with that exfoliated, skin by products; dropping on the floor beside her, “i don’t” know if it truly was that one down: town upside down sign that pointed me in the direct shun of the poop mobile, i love hte poop i pray to himself all the day glo gosh darn time, so if you see me in down town walking with the lady with the exfoliating skin that just she can’t keep everyone from throwing up, it’s just weird!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  27. “Me, that is to say I, as in the presently speaking person… will let me introduce myself first the universally rotund detective Harold Puysoin (pronounced pooey-swan) ‘ave gathered you ‘ere in dis ‘ere parlour to…er, what was it? Terribly sorry everyone I uh lost my… MURDERER! What? Yeah it was him, funny beard, knife, inheritance case closed. What do you mean WHO am I talking to?! Isn’t it obvious!!!?

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  28. Challenging a trickster to twist your inner ear around soliloquy or rambling commentary contemplating or congratulating some insignificant pseudo accomplishment might seem a worthy enterprise or sweet distraction, but traction can be a problem, since the minnow chooses the shallows over the pike weed beds.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  29. I am too enamoured of words, their power to engage and their ability to capture the imagination to write a truly horrible sentence. My artform is defined around a specific count of complex sentences. I am sure some might classify many as horribly structured, but I cannot. Brush strokes need not be made with the dominant hand to move the eye as intended.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s